Trying Not to be Hard on Myself

I’ve been meaning to sit down and write this blog for over a week now. I knew what I wanted to write about, I just needed to sit down with my laptop and type it out, but I really struggled to find the energy or motivation to actually do it. However, I’m trying not to be too hard on myself because this kind of thing is something I experience around this time every year. Once the holidays are over, the new year well and truly begun and that routine kicks back in; stuck inside due to the weather and invariably suffering from the sniffles, I just find myself feeling drained. This makes it a time of year where I really need to put effort into self-care to keep from feeling low.

I’m definitely not alone in this. Not everyone experiences it, but enough do that the “January blues” is a well documented phenomenon. Up here in Scotland, where we are lucky if we see much daylight in winter; higher numbers of people are diagnosed with Seasonal Affective Disorder (otherwise known as S.A.D. or “winter depression”); and far more of us, to a greater or lesser extent, are affected by this lack of sunlight and time outside than will ever seek that diagnosis.

On top of this, the holiday season can be draining in its own way. We spend so long preparing for it, talking about it, shopping for gifts, organising what we are doing, that many of us are knackered before the holidays even arrive. When they do, we may find that spending extended periods of time with our families can be less than idyllic. Or it may heighten feelings of isolation for those of us spending the holidays alone. New Years Eve comes with its attendant reflections on the year past and expectations for the new one coming with the weight of resolutions to be kept or broken. And then, without much time to recharge or reset our routine, it’s back to work (for those of us lucky enough to even be off work over the holidays.)

After all of this, it’s no wonder that January can be a time where a lot of us are feeling a bit down and just want to hibernate.

Now, what I’m not saying here is that however you might be feeling right now is just because of the time of year. In the past when I have experienced periods of bad stress or depression at this time of year and spoken to friends about it, it sometimes irked me a bit to hear variations of “it’s just this time of year” as a response. No, it wasn’t “just this time of year,” the things that were happening in my life and the stuff that I was feeling weren’t simply a product of the season and weren’t things that could just be shrugged off. That stuff is very real.

So, what am I saying here?

I suppose my point is that, while we shouldn’t ignore or try to minimise what we are experiencing, we can still acknowledge that for many of us this is a tough time of year where looking after our mental health can become more of a struggle.

From my own experience, I know that when I begin to feel this way, when I’m lacking in energy and when it’s dark, wet and cold outside, some of the first things I’ll often decide to stop doing are self-care activities. I’ll stop going out or visiting friends as much, I’m less likely to exercise, I’ll even fall behind on some day-to-day tasks such as tidying my house or doing some of the little admin tasks that make my life easier. With all of this combined it becomes far easier for stuff to start getting on top of me.

So, I guess I’m writing this as a wee reminder to be looking out for and looking after ourselves as much as we can, particularly at this time of year when that might take more effort. And, to say that, if you are struggling with your mental health this January and feel like you want to talk to someone about it, we at LPG are here to help you through it.

By Paul Johnson